Although I am truly grateful and happy to have finally gotten a job from my own exertions, I now have a blooming case of anxiety about it. I've never done a job like this before in my life, where someone else's day and perhaps even life is in my hands. Not only that, but I've realized when I get going on my own, I will literally be the only one working at "my job." I've never worked completely alone before.
Through the rest of June I will be training alongside someone, but as early as tomorrow I'll be doing everything myself. At least when working with this particular other assistant. She will be there, but she wants me to do everything myself (I feel that one night of 2.5 hours and one day at 5 hours is not very much prep time!). I am feeling some legit levels of anxiety just thinking about it. There is just so incredibly much to remember, but that I know will just come with time and repetition. What worries me is the language barrier, if there is one or that you could call it that. While I'm doing just fine so far, I fear that once I truly am left on my own I may not understand what the man I work with is saying and/or wants. You see, he is Danish. Danish is not Swedish, although they are quite closely related. He has been living in Sweden for several decades, but still doesn't speak Swedish very closely to the way Swedes do.
I had to let that out somewhere! Poor J will probably get tired of it quick, although he's told me several times now that I'll be just fine. I try to talk myself into saying that it's just how it is with all new jobs, the anxiety of being new and unfamiliar with routines and not really fitting quite into the picture yet. Of course there's that and I expect it. So I guess I'll just have to take things as they come. I can only do my best! I did feel today though that I was getting used to how he speaks and understanding more and more. Okay, I feel at least a tad bit better now having put my slight fears down into words!